My Box

Sorry bad sad poetry follows, I am feeling low and need to get it out.   I have pushed back, I have fought hard. It’s never ending, it flows on and on. But there is always the box.   I am retreating, I am worn down. It is encompassing, it is pushing me to the … Continue reading My Box

Taken Down by a Pizza

The pizza was the final straw, the last part of a jigsaw that came together to to bring me the special of the day, a shut down. To anyone around I'm sure it looks as though I am behaving like a spoilt child sulking over not getting what they wanted, there may be a tiny … Continue reading Taken Down by a Pizza

Mixed Emotions

So it's been a fairy eventful week, one that has included experiences that left me shocked, scared and worried for the future but also overwhelming grateful, loved, cared for and hopeful. Seven days ago with no little amount of anxiety I along with my wife and best friend made our way to the Shalbourne Suite … Continue reading Mixed Emotions

What’s going on?

I would never claim that I have a hard life or that things are unfair, whilst it certainly isn't easy and there have been some straight up horrible bits, I am in many ways incredibly lucky. That said I feel like I'm on a bungee cord above the opening of a volcano, one minute I … Continue reading What’s going on?

I Still Don’t Know if I’m Happy

I've been trying to figure out lately what happy is so I can know if it describes me. Now I have a very clear idea of what it means to be unhappy in fact I know what it means to be crushingly miserable but this is not about that. This is about happy, something that … Continue reading I Still Don’t Know if I’m Happy

Things I like

This is not as you may have thought a blog about things I like to do like say sailing, swimming or skydiving. (I don't like skydiving but was on a role with S's)No this is part one of the things I like to do such as particular stims, I will included what I like about … Continue reading Things I like

Stimming: We’re more alike than you may think.

Stimming is short for self-stimulating, which doesn’t sound great so you can see why it is shortened to stimming. A quick Google search (other search engines are available) will tell you that stimming is repetitive movements, sounds or use of objects. So that’s straight forward then what else is there to say? Well quite a … Continue reading Stimming: We’re more alike than you may think.